Let’s be real: when your provider won’t stop talking about weight, it’s exhausting. You came to talk about your pregnancy, your symptoms, your baby, your goals—not to get another lecture about BMI. You didn’t sign up for a nutrition consult. You didn’t ask for a weight-loss plan. You just wanted care.
And yet… here they go again.
It’s like some providers get stuck on a loop:
“Because of your weight…”
“With your BMI…”
“We really need to talk about your weight…”
Meanwhile, you’re sitting there thinking: Okay, but can we talk about literally anything else? Like the baby?!
Good news: you can shut it down—politely or firmly, whatever your vibe is—and still get quality, respectful prenatal care.
And you do not need to justify your body to anyone.
This blog will give you:
✨ real examples of weight talk pregnancy and how to redirect it
✨ simple scripts to set fat pregnancy boundaries
✨ what to say when an OB is stuck in a BMI obsession doctor spiral
✨ a client story + a testimonial about how powerful advocacy can be
✨ a resource to get personalized support
Let’s dig in.
First, You’re Not Imagining It: Weight Talk Happens WAY Too Much
Here are some common things pregnant people tell me they hear:
- “You really need to watch your weight this trimester.”
- “People your size have more complications.”
- “We need to weigh you every visit—it’s important for your pregnancy.”
- “Have you considered dieting?” ← yes, someone actually said this to a pregnant client
- “Your BMI puts you in a special category.”
- “We’ll schedule an early induction because of your weight.”
And sometimes it’s less obvious but just as harmful:
- The long pause at the scale.
- The raised eyebrow while typing into the chart.
- The sigh before discussing test results.
- The provider who talks at you, not with you.
These aren’t small things.
These moments add up.
They shape how safe, heard, and respected you feel.
And you deserve better.
A Quick Story: How One Client Took Her Power Back
A few months ago, I worked with a client—let’s call her Maria—who dreaded prenatal appointments. Not because pregnancy was hard, but because every single visit turned into a conversation about her weight.
She told me, “I swear, if my doctor brings up my BMI one more time, I’m going to scream.”
At her 24-week appointment, she went in to discuss pelvic pain. Within two minutes, her provider said, “This pain is probably because of your weight.”
No exam.
No follow-up questions.
No assessment of her posture, ligaments, or baby’s position.
Just weight talk.
Maria felt invisible. She said, “I walked out feeling like a number—not a person.”
So in our session, we practiced scripts, grounding statements, and ways to redirect the conversation. We talked through exactly what she wanted to say and how to say it. She left feeling confident, prepared, and supported.
At her next appointment, her provider began the usual BMI monologue. Maria smiled and calmly said:
“I’m not discussing weight today. I’d like to stay focused on my pelvic pain and the plan for supporting that.”
And guess what?
The provider stopped.
They checked her pelvis.
They evaluated the pain properly.
They treated her like a human again.
She texted me after:
“CHRISTINA. I DID IT. I shut down the weight talk without apologizing or explaining anything. And the appointment actually felt good.”
This is the power of boundaries.
This is the power of practice.
This is the power of support.
Why Providers Get Stuck on Weight (And Why It’s Not Your Job to Fix It)
Some providers are genuinely trying to help. Some are repeating outdated training. Some are terrified of liability. Some simply don’t know how to treat fat patients with respect. And some are honestly just rude.
But none of these reasons justify making every appointment about weight.
Here’s the truth:
BMI is a blunt, outdated tool that does not measure health or predict outcomes on its own. Research shows that weight stigma in pregnancy does more harm than weight itself (Nagpal et al., 2021; Rodriguez et al., 2020).
So when you shut down unnecessary weight talk, you are not being “difficult.” You are protecting your mental health, your access to care, and your nervous system.
How to Shut Down Weight Talk During Pregnancy
(Scripts You Can Actually Use)
Here are tools you can use TODAY. Pick your vibe:
✨ The Neutral Redirect
“I’m not discussing weight today. I’d like to focus on my actual concerns.”
✨ The Firm Redirect
“Weight is not relevant to what I’m asking. Please answer my question directly.”
✨ The Data-Driven Redirect
“Can you explain how my BMI changes the management of this specific issue?”
(They often can’t.)
✨ The Empowered Boundary
“I do not consent to weight-loss conversations during pregnancy.”
✨ The Reframe
“My health is more than a BMI number. Let’s talk about my actual markers.”
✨ The Backup Plan
If they push again:
“I need a different provider who can focus on my health, not just my weight.”
And yes—you’re always allowed to switch.
When Your Provider Won’t Stop… Here’s What’s REALLY Going On
If a provider repeatedly drags every conversation back to weight, it’s usually because:
- They don’t have size-inclusive tools
- They were taught weight = risk without nuance
- They’re using weight as a shortcut
- They’re uncomfortable with fat bodies
- They don’t understand weight stigma
- They aren’t practicing evidence-based care
None of this is about you. It’s about their limitations. And you don’t have to shrink yourself to make someone else more comfortable.
A Testimonial: “Christina Gave Me My Voice Back.”
One of my Fat Birth Power Hour clients shared this:
“Christina gave me my voice back. I had no idea how to stop the BMI lecture that happened at every appointment. After our session, I walked into the next visit, used one script she taught me, and my provider IMMEDIATELY shifted. It was the first appointment in my whole pregnancy where I felt respected. I wish I had done the Power Hour sooner.”
I Love It Because…
If You Want to Practice These Scripts in Real Time…
A blog can give you great language, but practicing advocacy is a whole different experience.
If you want:
✨ personalized scripts
✨ clarity on your rights
✨ confidence setting boundaries
✨ support preparing for a difficult OB
✨ help managing nerves during appointments
You can book a Fat Birth Power Hour with me right here.
I’ll help you step into your appointments with confidence—not fear.
I love writing about how to stop BMI conversations during pregnancy because so many people don’t realize they’re allowed to do it.
You’re allowed to protect your peace.
You’re allowed to set boundaries. You’re allowed to redirect conversations that do not serve you. When you learn how to do that, everything shifts—your appointments, your stress levels, your trust in your body, your whole pregnancy experience.
This is your pregnancy.
Your body.
Your story.
Your voice.
You deserve to take up space in every single appointment.
Sources
Nagpal, T. S., et al. (2021). Beyond BMI: Pregnancy-related weight stigma increases health risk.
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11457956/
Rodriguez, A. C. I., et al. (2020). Pregnant and postpartum women’s experiences of weight stigma.
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7457255/
Sasidharan, J., et al. (2025). Weight stigma and maternal health: A scoping review.
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC12060377/
McAuliffe, F. M., et al. (2020). Management of prepregnancy, pregnancy, and postpartum obesity.
https://obgyn.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1002/ijgo.13334